Let’s Be Real-Sharing My Feelings

So I’m just going to be real, everything isn’t all sunshine and rainbows as it may seem. I am may seem so brave and strong, but truth be told I’m not always that strong girl. Honestly, I am tired and frustrated right now. I am sick and tired of cancer! I may be done with treatment, but now I will have long term side effects for the rest of my life. Chemotherapy killed the cancer, but now I am stuck with fixing everything it messed up. I am frustrated with everything I have to endure and go through. I am tired of being in pain and taking pain medication. It wears down ┬ámy body. I have been through so much and don’t want to go through anything else. I feel like no one understands, my family gets it but at the same time doesn’t get it. Even though they don’t always get it, I thank them for their support. Whenever there is a teen scene with Candlelighters, I am not feeling well or worn out. I really need to talk to other teens that have been through what I have been through.

Right now, I really need prayer! I don’t want to go into a deep depression over this. I just really need you guys to pray for me right now. I am just going through some things. Your prayers are so greatly appreciated! I know God will help me through this, I just need to have faith in him.

Sinus Infection

Last week I started having a sore throat and it has now turned into something worse. My immune system isn’t fully restored so we went into the clinic.

Yesterday, I came in to Children Specialty Center due to having an extreme sore throat (I could barely talk), my body was hurting all over and was very weak (I could barely stand; I needed help standing and walking), nasal congestion/runny nose/drainage, and woozy feeling. They took me back immediately. As soon as I got in the room, my mother helped me on the bed and I curled up and closed my eyes. I was feeling so sick. Grace and Arlene came in and made me smile.

Grace said, “A lot of children (from the clinic) going back to school or have siblings going to school are coming in sick.” Then, I seen the doctor. She ordered that I get a bag of fluids with an antibiotic. I also got morphine because we rushed out of the house before I was able to take my medicine. My pain was a 10. Nurse Mary and Dr. Rashid also said to stay hydrated. The doctor wrote prescriptions for antibiotics, pain medicine for my sinus headaches, and for my raised heavy medication.

When we left, my mom and I stopped to get something to eat and then came straight home. I grabbed my food, thanked my mom and went straight to my room. I ate and dozed off and slept for a couple hours. I was extremely exhausted.

Today I got up and took a shower to make myself feel better. I started my antibiotics and pain medicine last night. I feel a bit better. I am resting staying hydrated as ordered and keeping on my regimen of medicine. Thank you to all my prayer warrior for your continuous prayers. Thank you to my doctors and nurses for getting me medication. Most of all, Thank you to God and my family for being by my side and taking care of me and praying over me.