It ‘s Okay Not to Be Okay

So, I follow twin YouTubers named, The Dolan Twins. They are very funny and inspiring. They came out with a video on July 27, they were talking about not hiding your true feelings and acting happy when you are not.

The Video:

It reminded me of when I used to dumb down my pain or act as if I was okay. At one point, I thought I had to be strong and be the inspiration everyone said I was. I used to feel like I was burdening people when I was in pain. Whenever I was in pain, I felt like if I said something I would ruin what we were doing. I realized that it was not good to do that. I also realized it is okay not to be okay, I am going to hurt sometimes, I am going to feel sick sometimes. I don’t know maybe it was just me who thought this way. I do want other people going through similar things or anything at all, to know that it is okay not be okay. It is okay if your not up to doing anything, its okay if you feel sick or are hurting. Don’t do what I did, for a while it caused issues. I had to figure out what I could take and use for my pain because I was hurting myself by not saying anything.

Just wanted to tell you guys this and give some advice..

An Inspiring Song

I was on YouTube the other day I came across a song called Rise Up by Andra Day, it came out  in 2015 Here is the link: .

It is very inspiring to me. One of the lyrics is, “I’ll rise up
In spite of the ache”. Everyday during treatment, I struggled to get out of bed, it hurt and I felt so sick. Even now, dealing with all the side effects from treatment, I don’t feel like getting up out of bed. Knowing I have my family right by me and God giving me strength each everyday helps me get up and fight through the day. I do want to say, you are not alone, you have my support. I have lost so many people through this journey, and I WILL RISE UP AND FIGHT FOR YOU AND THEM.

It’s Official…

So I had a doctors appointment with my knee doctor and we discussed whether or not I am going to have surgery. It’s official I will be having surgery on MY left knee during Christmas break, so I don’t miss any school. It is basically the same as last time, with my right knee. We still need to make the final decisions about if we’re going to use a graft or cement in my leg. Please continue to keep my family and I in your prayers as we make the final decision on what to use for this surgery.

An Updated “About Alyssa”


(I wanted to updated/add to my “About Alyssa”, because I have come so far since I have started this blog. Here are some updates.)

Hi my name is Alyssa Marie! I am now 16 years old and 6 months. As of June 9th this year, I will be 2 years out of treatment. I had Pre B cell Acute Lymphoblastic Leukemia (also know as ALL) and was diagnosed on February 20, 2013. Cancer took hold of my life for the past few years, but now I am taking it back. Today I am living my life outside of the hospital, outside of the wheelchair, and beyond the chemo. I now go to public school, barely missing days. I now walk in school and everywhere else. I have accomplished so much and come so far. I have come back from all the surgeries. I have fought my way back to recovery. Now I am living each day, a day at a time. Taking advantage of every moment.

Everyday is a Blessing

This week has been so amazing! School has especially been amazing! I am so thankful to be able to wake to the beautiful morning sun each and every day. Remember each and everyday is a blessing. Enjoy everyday you are given. Especially, enjoy the people you share the day with. With all I have went through and and seen on this journey, I have learned to take everyday as it comes. I’ve learned that you can always find one bright thing in everyday. I thank God for today and for everyday after that he gives me……

Happy Birthday!!?

October 2,

Today is my birthday! Sweet 16! I am so thankful for the 16 years of life I was given! With all i have went through, I thankful to spend this day with my family! A huge thank you to my family for always being by my side. Thank you to my parents for raising me! An a thank you to everyone for the birthday wishes. Today I am going to spend time with my family and go worship Jesus at church today and thank him for the years I was given.



Why Ranch Visit

(For some reason this blog post didn’t post so here it is from months ago.)

10/17/15, my family and I went to Serve Las Vegas. My church, Valley Bible Fellowship, does this about three times a year. The church gathers together and we go out and serve our city. We love on people and share the love of Jesus Christ with people. Today the ministries we had about six ministries. One of those ministries was Why Ranch. Why Ranch is a nonprofit youth organization providing a safe place for socially challenged children to experience personal healing through horse therapy, as written on there Facebook page. A friend of mine Gabi and her daughter went there! My mom actually knows Deanna and it was so nice to finally meet her and talk with her! We got to help clean and straighten up around the ranch and pet the horses and see all the other beautiful animals! We got to pray for the ranch and they prayed over us. I am so happy that we got to volunteer and help out around the ranch! We will definitely be back to volunteer and experience all they have to offer a t the ranch! I want to thank Why Ranch for this amazing experience today!